Goodbye for now.

I've decided it's time to let her go. No more emails, texts, MSN chats, Facebook comings and goings. I've let her go in the sense that I'll leave her alone. This is temporary since more than likely in the future, our paths will cross again. Whether or not we decide to mutually pick up the friendship again is really up to her. Mind you, we're still friends, just not as close as we once were. I feel that if something is bugging me I can't talk to her about it since I've caused her enough grief already. True love is when you love somebody so much that you're willing to sacrifice your happiness for theirs. That's how I feel. I feel she would be happier in the long run if I leave her alone, hence, letting go.

Time

How much time is needed? Some people tell you that you have all the time in the world, but you really and truly don't. If friends really want that friendship, the effort should willingly come from both sides. Julianne Baird told me once "if you want it bad enough, you'll get it." Sure, one can still write emails and use Facebook...but you lose a sense of touch. You don't see them anymore and soon become another face in the crowd. You can reach out to them all day long, but it's their choice if they bother to reach back. When, if ever, should one stop reaching out? It's better to give then receive, but not with a one-sided friendship. How do you know if the person still wants the friendship? And when I go home, will she even miss me? I know I'll miss her but will she miss me as a friend, an acquaintence, or just one of the chaplaincy crowd? Or will it be the other way around. Ya know, God forbid, it may turn out that I may never see Chap peeps again. If that does happen, much will be regretted between us.